FAQ

Is an end-of-life doula the same thing as a death midwife?

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Yes. The names are interchangeable. Death doulas and midwives have been assisting the dying long before the funeral industry existed. Until the Civil War and the implementation of the embalming process used to preserve the bodies of the dead left on the battlefield, the tending of the dead was left in the hands of women, much like the care of children and the sick.

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But what does an EOL doula do?

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If I listed everything we do, you wouldn’t read through it anyway, so I’m just going to say that our role is to provide compassionate support—physical, emotional, spiritual, practical—for the dying and their loved ones. See my Services Offered page for a comprehensive list of what I can provide in particular. Every EOL doula has her area of expertise and comfort, so it’s important to find one who fits your needs. Doulas are not a one-size-fits-all professional; do your research and be picky. This person is going to spend a lot of time with you and your family.

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What training is required for certification?

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There are numerous EOL doula training programs and courses throughout the country. At this point, the industry is not regulated, so training varies. There are EOL doulas out there who have not completed formal training, but have much hands-on experience. Most training programs are offered online and taught by professionals. Specialized courses are offered for those who wish to focus on a specific area of care.

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Is there anything an EOL doula can’t do?

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Yes. We are not formally trained to perform any medical procedures or processes. Unless a doula specifically states that s/he has had medical training, all medical activity—from giving medication to tending to IV drips and beyond—must be performed by licensed medical professionals. 

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When is it time to hire an EOL doula?

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The general answer is, it’s never too early. Many people hire an EOLD when hospice begins. But end of life care is not dependent upon life expectancy; it is useful even when you are still actively seeking treatment and cure. It’s always a good idea to have time to truly get to know our clients, so that we can tailor our services to their individual wants, personalities, and needs. Remember, people are either living or they’re dead. As long as they’re living, they deserve compassionate, personal care based on preserving dignity and providing comfort. If the idea to hire an EOL doula crosses your mind, it’s probably time to start the search for finding one.

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Do we have to talk about death? It makes me uncomfortable.

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Well, yes, we do, but only to a point, and only as it pertains to the client. Speaking for myself, I will not force you into any conversations you don’t want to have. My experience is that most people who don’t like to talk about death feel that way because they fear the unknown. Once we start talking about it, exploring it, naming what we fear…death isn’t so scary. As for the dying themselves? Death isn’t what they usually fixate on. Their main concern, time and again, is the well-being of the people they will leave behind. And pain—no one wants to die in pain. But I won’t let that happen, so you can cross that concern off your list.

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What is the difference between palliative care and hospice? 

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Palliative care focuses on prevention and relief of suffering. Many patients in palliative care continue to seek treatment and even cure for their illness. Hospice is a service suggested by medical professionals usually when patients have approximately 6 months or fewer to live. The focus of hospice is on comfort and quality of life. It can be provided in-home or in a facility, and research shows that the earlier hospice is offered, the better the outcomes. Hospice centers around “whole person” care.

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What towns do you serve?

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Passages serves the New Hampshire/Vermont Upper Valley, which includes:

(NH) Canaan, Claremont, Cornish, Croydon, Dorchester, Enfield, Grantham,

Hanover, Haverhill, Lebanon, Lyme, New London, Newbury, Newport, Orford,

Piermont, Plainfield, Springfield, Sunapee, and Wilmot (VT) Barnard, Bradford,

Chelsea, Corinth, Fairlee, Hartford, Hartland, Newbury, Norwich, Pomfret,

Reading, Ryegate, Sharon, Strafford, Thetford, Topsham, Tunbridge, Vershire,

Weathersfield, Windsor, and Woodstock.